The Email Number (part of the Carnival of Journalism #jcarn )

Prompt for the Carnival of Journalism: "What emerging technology or digital trend will upend journalism next?"

My original intent for this post was to discuss my dream of a device that jumps off the screen and brings us to a point that we no longer consider the exact dimensions of a smartphone, tablet, desktop and tv screen. Nothing excites me more than the concept of a small device (smart phone-sized or so) capable of storing and transporting all of the users data that is equipped with the ability to project it's display to any size of image. But that dream will not be the next great disruption to the present models of journalism.

After reading a beautifully sensational headline from the BBC (Social Messaging Apps 'lost networks $13.9bn in 2011), I am far more concerned about the digital methods users have available to obtain access to information and journalistic work.

The juxtaposition of journalism outlets attempting to expand their capabilities to every form of media and the telecomm industry's desire to minimize all costs of transferring data (for the providers, not the users) present great difficulties for the development of digital journalism and communication. While the direct effects of the battle between those who desire that we move less bits across the webs and those who are creating more and more expansive presentations for content will impact on how reporters perform their duties, I see greater implications for users' ability and willingness to afford purchasing journalism and content, in general.

Might users be willing to spend more on journalism content if they spend (or at least feel as if they spend) less on the digital connection to access the content?

I am curious what would happen if we could reduce the amount we pay for the delivery mechanism of media - connectivity - in terms of users' willingness to pay for media. Heavy users commonly purchase access to content through multiple channels - cellular, cable, satellite and/or landline/dial-up services - and are billed for each service. The threat of $14 billion being lost solely to cell phone users using 3g connections to communicate rather than SMS has not gone unnoticed. Telecomm providers have already begun ratcheting up prices on data, throttling the heaviest users and attempting to minimize the necessary expansion in infrastructure to accommodate the added demand.

But what if only one connection to the web were necessary and the user could access all content through one portal and be billed for all of the tv watched, all of the news read, all of the email sent, and all of the calls taken? Surely, users would expect a reduction in the amount they paid in total if they only had to pay for one service, right? And doubly-certain, the telecomm providers would not be willing to concede such proceeds without a battle. But let us consider what users might do if they were able to reduce their bill for  connectivity.

I am interested in the convergence of the user's accounts and how they obtain their information. Many friends have traded in their access to traditional cable television in favor of a broadband internet connection and subscriptions to Netflix, XBOX Live and other content providers. Their internet has become their TV.

Next in the convergence of devices through digital technology is the merging of the telephone number and the email account. Telecomm companies have recognized this threat and have been less than accommodating to the new entries to the market. Services like Google Voice and Skype, the line distinguishing the two services is becoming increasingly non-existent.

In the desktop interface. Google Voice's telephone functions appear in the same manner as email and instant messaging services with text messages displayed in a orderly fashion and voicemail transcribed into text form. If desired, copies of messages can be delivered to the user's email address. If a user can connect the computer to the web through the same connection as the smartphone, then why would a user pay separately for the services?

If cell phone users are already saving $14 billion by avoiding SMS charges, how much more would be saved if heavier digital communication users were able to eliminate redundant charges for connectivity? Even if the overall price for such services did not decrease, might users be more prone to spend money on journalism content simply because they have reduced four bills to one?

Whether publications generate revenue from their end users (the readers, viewers, and listeners, not the advertisers or sponsors) through direct payments for content, membership programs, or the solicitation of voluntary contributions, I believe users will be far more apt to make such transactions if they are not burdened by multiple charges for their data connectivity.

My friends' abandonment of cable TV service in favor of content subscriptions through Hulu Plus and Netflix was made because it saved money and was just as easy as the more expensive alternative. The same choice will soon be made as users consider their access to cellular and broadband connectivity. Without a need for a distinction between email and telephone, payment for the latter will surely be questioned when the former is commonly obtained free-of-charge.

This is the opportunity for content creators - journalists, specifically - to create a new norm where paying for content is the common, accepted practice. If users can save money on the way they connect to content, the creators of content have a tremendous opportunity to present a compelling case that they receive a portion of these savings.

At the same time, as users are better able to afford content, they can be more and more selective with their purchases. The quality of content will always drive the development of (paying) supporters of a brand. In addition to hesitation from users to pay, telecomm companies will are already exhibiting great resistance to increase the burden placed upon their networks to transfer bigger and bigger pieces of content.

However, there is no better time to attempt to justify a monetary value for one's content than now. While I do not advocate for an internet full of paywalls, I do support journalists, artists and all creators of interesting work be fairly compensated for their contributions to our society.

Now is the time to use the most creative of methods to appeal to users and present a compelling case for why dollars previously spent on connectivity should now be spent on content. Best of luck to all journalists and content creators!

Then, once we have merged our connections into one channel, we will build a smartphone capable of projecting a movie for the whole drive-in to enjoy!

Gamification: Groundwork for the future of the CU Independent

At long last, the report is complete and published for public consumption on the Digital Media Test Kitchen website . . . now for you all to go read it!

This research project involved a specialized Qrank quiz game and how it could be used to help boost the readership of the CU Independent. While this report details the process of getting the game up and running, boosting usage of the game and in turn, the opportunities developing a core user base presents to the CUI, we hope to proceed forward with the research and discover if such a game can increase the news literacy level of the players.

We had hoped to further explore the game's abilities to boost usage and news literacy rates, but a litany of obstacles impeded us from making further progress in the first year of work. This is not to say time was lost or wasted. The report details the impediments we have overcome and lays out a succinct strategy for avoiding similar problems in the future.

Simply put, the CUI has three essential tasks to accomplish to make the use of this quiz game a success:

• Establish strong newsroom buy-in. An engaged editor and social media editor are essential for pushing the rest of the newsroom to help generate content suitable for the game. Content compels attention and without quality news content, the questions in the game will in turn fail to hold the user's attention.
• Market the game to users. We thoroughly proved the common knowledge that without a marketing effort, even the best of products will not sell.
• Market the game to sponsors. Obtaining advertisers to sponsor the game will require presenting the new game to the potential sponsors and explaining all of the new avenues available to promote their product or work. No potential sponsor should be assumed to understand how the new game works and the benefit it can provide to them.

Yes, this is absolutely a clear cut path to financial salvation for the CU Independent and an impressively informed level of news literacy for the readers of the publication. Or it might just be a fun game. Not like there's anything wrong with fun and games riding along in a news publication. Remember the good old days of doing the crossword puzzle in the Daily Lobo in class? . . . I'm sure none of you ever read the comics, either.

What do you think? If I told you that if you did the best on a quiz game about current events you'd win $20 to your favorite local watering hole, would you go read the headlines? What if you were simply able to rub the results in your (inferior) friend's face and show the world who was the master of news trivia? 

Sharing My Content With the World

Here's my first test with Repost.us. Go check them out! They are making it easier for bloggers independent journalists to share their work across the web with the click of a button.

I'm excited to give it a shot and I boldly challenge you to do precisely what bunches the panties of the record labels - steal my content! Click the button, take my work and share it on your site. Enjoy it, let your audience enjoy it and hell, if you're really feeling up to it, expand upon it.

Repost takes care of keeping the formatting together, moves ads along with the content and will even let you track the usage of your work.

What do you think? Would you consider using Repost to expand your audience?

Newsgaming in Minnesota

I'd like to call everyone's attention to a brief post I shared on the Digital Media Test Kichen's website about my weekend spent newsgaming: Playing news games in Minnesota The gathering of scholars, game developers and journalists featured a lot of amazing projects that certainly left me a bit insecure about my puny little quiz game. 


But no, it's not a puny little quiz game! If you're in or around the Boulder, Colo. area, you should absolutely go test your knowledge of current events and pop culture. Play Qrank for CU on Facebook or load up the app on your iPhone/iPod Touch/iPad/iDon'tGiveARatsAss device. 


For more reading about the newsgames gathering in Minneapolis and insight into the potential of videogames to present news, I refer you to real journalist and San Jose Mercury News business reporter Chris O'Brien's write-up of the weekend: Why Are Newsroom Resistent to Creating Newsgames?

Ski with your friend

Yesterday, from the prompting of an article shared by @hhansman, I laid out my game plan for leading an enjoyable day of skiing from the perspective of a strong skier riding with a friend with less ability. Today, I offer the same advice but from the perspective of the rider seeking to keep up with their experienced friends.

Speak Up!

On the lift you will be roughly 6-60 inches from your friends. Take this time in close proximity to let them know what you're thinking and ask lots of questions (this will be repeated often as it's the best advice). Do you want to warm up with something easy? Tell them! Ask questions like: Do you know this mountain? Have you been here before? Figure out what your friend's game plan is and see how that aligns with your ideas.

Take the time while the snowboarders are strapping in to figure out a meeting point and know to which lift you are headed. If you rely on being able to visually follow your friends, you can easily be led into terrain more difficult than you desired, or worse, your friends can disappear out of sight and you will be left with no clue of where you're headed (and what trouble you're getting into).

Take advantage of your experienced friends' knowledge. Ask them what kind of terrain they are headed to and see if there are easier alternatives nearby. Odds are that your friends will have been to the mountain before and will be able to give you suggestions for trails that suit your level.

Eat shit!!!!!!!!

Do you remember seeing this yesterday in the advice to the shredders? Well, it's good advice for you too. To borrow a phrase from my grandfather, "A day you don't fall down is a day you didn't learn anything." The strongest riders amongst my friends are still working on plenty of aspects of their form. Make the most of riding with better skiers and let them lead you into something you've never tried before.

Take your time, work your way through around the mountain and take an extra second to dust yourself off when you eat it. Whatever you do, just remember that the only way to do it wrong is to take the board(s) off and walk. There are plenty of ass-slide maneuvers that can get you down your poorest choices while keeping some of your dignity intact.

Don't eat too much

While I feel the best thing you could do for your day is to follow your friends into a slope you wouldn't normally select, there are limitations to this. As was suggested to the pros, when stepping it up to the next level, it is good to have outlets should the terrain become too overwhelming. Taking on a tough challenge earlier in the day before the legs are beaten up is a good way to avoid disasters. This being said, the first run of the day is not the time for the cliff jump.

Don't agree to do a slope just to try to keep up with your friends. If you aren't a strong enough rider, you won't keep up with your friends. They can quickly disappear and leave you alone to fight your way down the crusty bumps (unless they are heeding my advice).

Find other routes that reconnect with your friends after they jump off the cliff. The challenges you take should inspire you to do something even harder on your next day, not leave you with nightmares of the day you spent two hours crawling down one run. Feel like you’ve accomplished something, not that you’ve simply survived.

Ask more questions

Again, friends who are more experienced on the mountain possess knowledge that should be of use to you. Pry that knowledge out of them and try out some new techniques. They are probably already waiting to give you advice, but if they are following my suggestion from yesterday, they are politely withholding comment until it is requested.

For those most interested in learning a better technique for their riding, I encourage you to study the words of the great golf instructor Harvey Penick. Penick's Little Red Book provides very wise lessons not on the mechanics of the golf swing, but on the psychology of instruction and learning. Chief amongst his rules of instruction was to only use positive language in describing proper positions, targets and methods. The emphasis was on the goal and with proper focus upon doing things the right way, it led the golfer to focusing on where they wanted to go, rather than on where they feared they might end up.

Take the same careful approach when discussing skiing and snowboarding with your friends and ask them to be as precise as possible in presenting their tips and advice. Ask them to demonstrate the actions they describe.

Watch your friends and see if they do the things they suggest. Be sure to ask them afterward. If you watched me all day on the mountain, you’d see me make a lot of sloppy turns in a manner that I would recommend to no one. Ask your friends if they executed the maneuvers as they planned or if they cheated the turn and got lazy.

Be ready for more fun

As I told the experts, a swimming suit should be mandatory ski gear. Not for the mountain, but for the aprés ski. You never know who you’ll run into that wants to offer you a beer a soak. Have a suit handy so you don’t have to offend their senses.

Also, don’t be so tired that you’re capable of doing little more than fill space on the couch. Yes, you have the excuse of enduring all of your friend’s dumb ideas. No, they aren’t going to be all that sympathetic. Be prepared for the friend with endless energy to want to go party in Breck and rage all night.

Enjoy!

However you approach the slopes, I would hope you leave them with good memories of an awesome day. You’re skiing, not working after all.

What do you think? What other advice would you offer for either the beginner or the expert in playing nicely with others?

Ski like a friend

My friend @hhansman was quite annoyed by this article on the etiquette of skiing with a date: Romancing the Slopes - Heather Burke (for those having problems with Boston.com's paywall, try opening the link in an Incognito/Porn-Mode Window) In an extremely rare aberation, I actually tend to agree with @hhansman -- whether I'm chasing a cute ski bunny or helping a friend from the flatlands survive on the mountain, I would say this advice is minimally applicable. The women I have skied with have always enjoyed much more adventurous days than that article described.

Now, for skiers’ and boarders’ benefit, I offer you my simple guide for experts and beginners to co-exist in perfect harmony. As Singles Awareness Day has come and gone, this advice has all combinations of riders in mind and is not necessarily geared toward turning a roll down a mountain into a roll in the sack.

What is your role?

Are you just getting comfortable pointing both tips straight downhill or are you easily bored by most inbound terrain? More importantly, how does your ability compare to that of the friends with whom you will be riding? Some days I'm herding chickens down blue groomers waiting and other days I'm gasping for breath as I'm pulled through the trees by my most extreme friends. Depending on who I’m with, I’m pulling or being pulled.

Today's discussion assumes the role of the stronger skier. Tomorrow will provide advice to those that are stuck dealing with a friend full of dumb ideas.

While you're approaching the hill, see what you can learn from small talk about previous experiences on the slopes. Is your new ski buddy talking about that one extreme run he took down a blue groomer "without making any stops”? Take this as your first clue to not take that buddy straight into the back country. Do you feel your eyes getting wider and wider as your new friend describes "big cliff jumps”? This is very vivid foreshadowing of what could be your impending doom should you blindly follow this friend around the mountain.

So who are you on this day? Are you going to wear the "Follow Me!" Green Jacket and be the pack leader or will the focus of your day's mission be self-preservation?

Follow me!

So you've told some stories and it sounds like your friend is about on your same level. See if you're right. When you get off the lift, find something reasonable to warm up on and let your friend ski in front of you. Take a look at what they're doing. See what decisions they make. Are you struggling to keep up with them or are you worrying that they won't have enough speed to make it across the catwalk? What slope do they choose?

If you are the better skier, you should consider it your duty to help your friend have the best day possible as they improve their ability. Yes, I'm saying you can convince your friend to attempt a new slope or two. This is not to be misconstrued to mean you have permission to head straight to the Outback and take your favorite runs through the woods.

Keep in mind: one poor decision can quickly erode all faith your skiing companion has in your selection of terrain and may turn an educational experience into a painful memory.

Find runs that offer terrain slightly more challenging than what your friend usually skis and see if they are interested in being a bit adventurous. Ideally, find runs with an easy way out. I grew up skiing Santa Fe and my favorite part about the mountain was that you were never pushed into anything you were uninterested in or unable to ski. The mountain had access points to slide into tough terrain and also bail out to easier runs.

In the terms of skiing with a new friend in Colorado, this means the Pallavicini Bowl at A-Basin is not the best place for a blue cruiser to take their first mogul turns. Find tough runs with easier stuff right next to them that can be quickly accessible should your friend tire of the more difficult terrain. Skip the top-to-bottom commitments like Pali and Keystone's Black Forest until your friend has proven they are really ready for such a beating.

Proper Pacing

The article on Romancing the Slopes suggested slowing down for your female companion. Better advice: keep your ski buddy in sight and stay in sight of them. My first day at Beaver Creek would have been ruined before completing the first run had I guessed incorrectly as to which direction my friends went. Luckily I chose the correct fork in the road and found my friends (impatiently) waiting at the lift.  

Even if you're skiing with your normal group, having a plan of where to reconvene helps reduce the stress of losing one's group and attempting to hunt them down for the rest of the day.

In terms of stopping for breaks, lunch and calling it a day, be observant of how much endurance your friend has. Are they starting to fall a lot more often? Are they steering to the easiest parts of the runs and minimizing the work? It might be time to get some lunch or throw in the towel for the day.

Bring a bag of tricks

Nothing warms up a wind-blown ride to the top of the mountain like busting out a tasty snack. Chocolate is all the things Burke described and also an awesome source of instant energy. Oranges are good way to freeze the hell out of your fingers while you peel the fruit. And any snack served on a lift is washed down well with a hoot from a flask of green chile tequila.

Eat shit!

Take that sugar high from the chocolate and the fearlessness from the tequila and go do something stupid and eat shit (and don't die)! If you're spending a day teaching a friend to ride, nothing helps their frustration pass like watching "the expert" go rolling down the hill. To begin a weekend with nine friends at Wolf Creek, I executed a flawless swan dive leaving both skis behind as I planted my face into the snow. The crowd went wild.

Extra points if you detach a ski along the way. No points if your fall is broken by another patron.

Don't teach them too much

Don't try to teach them everything. Better yet, don't try to teach them anything. Respond to questions and wait for them to be asked. No sports are better at turning friends against each other than golf and skiing as friends become the coach and coached. Despite the coach's best intentions, advice is often poorly received. Comments like "Maybe don't cross your tips on the icy traverse next time" can easily be interpreted as "You committed a basic error on the easiest part of the run, you idiot!"

In my one day of skiing Missouri, I went with two friends for their first days on the mountain of their career. One took off and was good to go. He didn't grasp the turning concept so firmly and found that rolling was the best way to reduce speed. The other struggled. I've never seen more brutal tumbles from a stand-still before in my life. He never ventured past the bunny hill while the other friend rode everything on the mountain.

What do these two guys have in common? Neither of them were interested in receiving any pointers from the veteran skiers. They both enjoyed their day and collected the lumps to prove it.

Finish strong

Packing in a few extra runs to catch last chair and leave yourself with a four-hour fight down I-70 is a great way to turn an awesome day into never-ending misery. If you're journeying back to the front range, beat the traffic and find a hot tub to sneak into while you wait for the roads to clear. Consider a swimming suit mandatory for every ski day, unless your friends (not you) are comfortable with you sneaking into their hot tub naked. You never know who you’ll run into and what friend will invite you for aprés ski.

Another reason to pass on the extra victory lap is so you're not a worthless blob after a good day on the hill. It's easy to ride hard all day, pour a drink, slip into the hot tub and say nothing intelligible for the rest of the evening. Don't be that bum! You know how you work. If you aren't going to have the energy at the end of the day to cook dinner, you better bring something up that is pre-made or be ready to drain the wallet. And don't forget to tip - it's expensive living in ski towns and the wait staff has to survive too!

See you tomorrow for an approach from the other perspective -- skiing with your expert friends.

Today, I (tried to) join the Diaspora!

I gave it a sincere effort at the very least. While I eagerly await my launch codes, I'd like to discuss the process of joining the Diaspora. 

Much has been made about Twitter's poor manner of welcoming new users. It is tantamount to Diaspora's success that they get sign-up process right, if they want to survive, or at least I say it is.

I heard about Diaspora as they capitalized on Facebook's failure to handle their security and privacy issues with any respect to their user base. I thought it was brilliant that they would offer an alternative to the abusive giant and attempt to siphon off Facebook's most discontented users.

Like many other users, I was disgusted in the manner that Facebook attempted to seize their users' data and sell the information to marketers. It wasn't the fact that they would provide the information to the highest bidder, it was Mark Zuckerberg claiming that it was precisely what the users desired.

I joined Facebook with a healthy degree of paranoia and attempted to be careful with how my page was exposed. This has become impossible as Facebook has arbitrarily changed privacy settings and the contents of my page without alerting me or requesting my approval. 

So viva la diaspora! On to a new network free of self-absorbed, greedy leadership (I felt this way about Zuckerberg well before I watch The Social Network) and also free all of the contacts I've amassed and all of the content I've socially bookmarked. But a network with a firm promise to be far less evil.

My friend sent me CNN's coverage of Diaspora's debut and reminded me to give these guys a shot. I agree, the next great fad will be something different from Facebook, but let's set one thing straight: the newsfeed did not kill Myspace. Facebook users hated the newsfeed and it's launch sparked a brief exodus of users. Facebook killed Myspace because they hired a bouncer and kept out spammers--Myspace left the door open and the rest is Rupert Murdoch's loss.

So I went to diaspora.com and discovered that the programmers are being thrifty and not wasting money on the fancy .com address. They do appear on the top of the Google results and you can start the sign-up process at joindiaspora.com.

I like the selling points – sorting of contacts in groups and then controlling sharing abilities are very desirable, but where's the sign-up box?! In the first page I can see how to follow them on Twitter but not on their own site! Which service do they want me to use?

Scrolling down it appears you have to sign up for an invite. I could have used a few more reminders about how special and exclusive of a beta tester I was about to become, but this works. I'll applaud them for not making the useless error of denying the plus sign as a valid character in my email address. If you're unaware of all of the good reasons to use a plus sign when signing up for stuff, read all about it.

I switch over to my email and there it is! My very own . . . request to confirm my subscription. Maybe it's just a matter of different terminology?

Nope. I've simply confirmed that I meant to give them this email address. They promptly sent me another message saying just that. So, that's one sign up form and two emails and I still haven't been able to fill out my favorite movie quotes or relationship status.

When does the fun begin?! How long does Diaspora hope I will sit eager in anticipation without having yet used any of their services? Much has been made of the number of Twitter users that sign up for an account never to return to it again. What kind of effect does Diaspora expect this to have on their success?

While I would love to support the competition, I fear for the future of this alternative. This is not the roll-out I would have planned. Even if the debut is in its infancy, I would have included a lot more discussion of their development. 

Give us a story! Let us fall in love with the process and create a dream of what Diaspora is going to be. If Twitter must be utilized, at least embed a feed of what you've posted about you product and keep me on your site. 

I hope they have something up their sleeve for the next great Facebook backlash. It has been a few months since Mark Zuckerberg has betrayed the trust of his half billion users and it surely will not be long before he angers them again.

After digging through Diaspora's twitter feed, it appears invitations for alpha testers were only open for four brief days in November and that I've missed the ship. So much for escaping the evil clutches of Facebook today.

Dey Tuk Ar Jobs!

After enduring a solid Sunday of being filled with knowledge, it would be a disservice to not regurgitate some of the wisdom through the internets.

From a pro tip provided by my academic advisor, I am attending the Silicon Flatirons Conference. Subjects have included content creation, distribution and piracy, broadband connectivity, net neutrality and anti-trust regulations.

This has been my first opportunity to follow the backchannel of an event I am attending. If you're curious to check it out, the tag is #flatirons (and if you stalkers want to know what I'm up to, jealousy is frequently inspired at @dingaaar). While it provides a productive outlet to voice instant reactions, I have not found it to be much more than an avenue to release our ADD tendencies.

Starting off a lively and intensely contested afternoon session was Mark Cooper. He laid out a big dirty pile of truthiness about how the internet is affecting media outlets and how much the web should be assisting, not harming them. Do you think Scripps shut down the Albuquerque Tribune and Rocky Mountain News because Craigslist stole all of their classified ad revenue? Mark's got a lot data to blow that idea out of the water.

Following Cooper's lead, Mark Lemley continued on to dispel the doomsday warnings of the "Chicken Littles" that compose the content industry (namely, RIAA, Disney and their usual company). Let's go on a quick trip through history and explore the old technologies that have been killed off by free distribution systems - to the time machine!

Most people would suggest to begin the journey in 1440 Germany where Johannes Gutenberg endeavored to un-employ monks across the chirstian world with the creation of his printing press. A damned machine was capable of accomplishing their duties for a far smaller price at a much expedited rate. Before one scribe received his neatly printed walking papers, far in the distance a presumptuous defender of the monks cried "dey tuk ar jobs!" (Southpark reference)

But that's ancient history and if we can agree upon on thing, it is that what happened 500 years ago is of minimal consequence to our present day. That being agreed, we'll leap forward to the middle of the 19th century and the introduction of the gramophone. Another infernal piece of technology sought to displace hard working labourers and provide joy to the masses for little to no cost.

Threatening the sanctity and purity of fine arts and music, the gramophone replicated the fine act of music performance for any random joe at any godforsaken hour he may chose to listen. Far in the distance, a choir sang in harmony "dey tuk ar jobs!"

Yet, despite all of the expert predictions, musicians did not trade in their horns for hammers. Karma would quickly circle around on the gramophone and before the gramophonographers could frivolously enjoy their millions, they faced extinction at the hands of radio.

How dare they freely disseminate music to the masses with little method to recoup costs? Having an important retreat to attend in the Mediterranean, gramophonographers recorded a quite contrite "dey tuk our jobs!" and it was mockingly replayed across the nation's radio waves with little compensation to the artists.

It would only be fitting that these shock jocks befall the same fate as those that were replaced before them. Cassette tapes dared to take the freely shared music on the radio and allow the user to save the tunes to be enjoyed at their leisure. Every morning, DJ's would take the airwaves and barbarously mourned the day "dey fukin tuk ar jobs!"

And it would not be long before more folk devils came to ruin the party, destroy empires and remorselessly turn the world on its head. The VCR presented the very same threat to television that cassette tapes posed to radio - people were going to save just what they wanted, skip the ads and ruin everything.

Surely, this would be the end of high-quality professional artists and entertainers. With the capability to record and save any media desired, people would never spend another dime or watch another commercial. In a more thunderous round than ever before actors, comedians, musicians, recording technicians, agents, concert promoters, and record label CEOs bellowed "dey tuk ar jobs!"

And here we are, 2010, another full-frontal assault on the Chicken Little Coup under way and the chicks are running in circles as if they've been decapitated. Yet, just like the last 570 years, they react to the coming apocalypse that will never arrive.

Now, if you don't mind me asking, please patronize the shit out of my sponsors and send panic through the newsrooms of the world as they join the scribes, gramophonographers and the rest of the entertainment industry in ruing the day "dey tuk ar jobs!"

Xmas 2.0

Did you participate in a secret santa this year? How'd it go? Yea, The Office's secret santa episode was pretty good. Did you get something cool?

How did you know the group of people with whom you exchanged gifts?

I'll scream bah humbug louder than any of you, but tonight I've actually found something that's gotten me in the holiday spirit. I'll still thank you never to play another xmas carol, but this is just plain cool. Not just for the awesome gifts, but for the manner in which they were exchanged.

The most interesting gift I believe I've ever seen given was exchanged amongst people that, mostly, had never met each other. Well, they may have never encountered each other in person out in the wild real world, but many of them interact every day via the website reddit.com.

Roughly 5000 people coordinated a record-setting secret santa exchange through the online community with what appears to be, record-setting success. The previous record, set just last year, has just been blown out of the water. Leave it to the internets to ruin everything.

So, about the gifts. I don't care what comes inside of a box shaped like this (a bottle of hooch would fit well), I'm not going to be disappointed:



But that's not the most excessive, decoyed, awesome gift possibly given this year. If anyone can top this gift, by all means, please send it my way. A movie, a great movie, and a nice piece of technology all encased within the most disappointing book anyone could receive on xmas.

If gadgetry isn't your thing, then maybe you'll appreciate this . . . thing that was sent through the reddit secret santa.



The recipient named it David.

It's really quite remarkable. What many people would consider random strangers are not just swapping gifts, but going all out to not be that loser that just sent a gift card. And I would have to argue with the description of this community as being "random strangers." Do you consider someone you speak with on a daily basis a random stranger? . . . These "random strangers" don't either.

And no, no one had a stalker show up at their door and slip their throat. Give up all of the worst-case-scenario possibilities of how anonymous gift givers could take advantage of the personal information and ruin lives. After being suggested to spend no more than $15 on the gift and shipping combined, the average amount expended has been closer to $35. Outliers have topped $2000.

Now that's the spirit of xmas! Trying to be the biggest badass possible through the offering of the best gift.

Campaign staffer allegedly assaulted by resident, dogs.

8/24/2008

NORTHGLENN – Around 5pm on Wednesday afternoon, a canvasser approached a house unaware of what was behind the door. Hoping to get just a vote or two, he was lucky to walk away with his life.

"I was excited when I approached the house," canvasser Ron Domino said. "No one was home yesterday and I could see her out in her driveway. I was excited that I would at least get to speak with someone."

The conversation that ensued was not what either had planned, though. When initially asked what the resident thought of Jared Polis – candidate for Colorado's 2nd Congressional District – the lady spoke harshly of his plans for the Iraq war.

‘I'm with John McCain. 100, 1000 years, I don't care how long it takes,’ Domino remembers her saying.

The interaction went from disagreeing to heated to worse. When the canvasser tried to steer the conversation away from the Presidential campaign and back to the Congressional race, things turned personal.

‘You're just doing this to put it on your résumé!’ the resident allegedly charged Domino.

Exacerbated with no insults to turn to, she embraced the Castle Doctrine for everything it never stood for. In the same breathe that she finally asked the canvasser to leave, she opened the gates and beckoned "sic em boys!"

"I was really lucky to not be hurt by her three dogs," Domino said. "Luckily for me, my friend just got a dog that hates me and it taught me how to walk away from an attacking dog without getting bitten."

No charges have been filed in the case and no one was injured in the altercation. Domino finished his route through the neighborhood ignoring the woman when she drove by allegedly challenging him to call the cops.

"Serves me right for trying to see if I could win her vote," Domino said. "Twenty more days to go! Maybe someone will put a gun in my face before I'm done knocking on doors!"